A bit of gold caught my attention. How could it be? How could it be the one thing to almost lose a second time?
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| A Bit of Gold 2019 Linnea Heaney |
About a year and a half before, I had found a small chain on the floor of a closet. It was on my last circle through the empty house, looking for anything missed.
This time, the chain appeared on the floor of a closet--again. But, in my brand-new home, a house halfway across the country, with boxes everywhere, and I spot the same small chain, nestled in the crack of a wood floor.
My breathing stopped. How could . . . coincidence doesn't seem to be the right word. Out of all the thousands of belongings moved time and again over the past months of change and temporary homes . . . how is the same gold chain lying on the floor, forgotten, again?
Reflecting on the journey--the positive, the sadness, the unfortunate, and the overwhelming stress of this relocation, my days felt uneasy. Too many changes and demands eroded my mostly centered life. Writing everyday seemed a distant goal. But, who am I, without writing, without some art? How do I find me?
Placing the gold chain on my bedroom window sill, I ponder the meaning of it resurfacing twice.
Months and months go by as life feels like a flood of challenges that weren't supposed to happen. Three years disappear. Change happens. And everyone is needing to find a way back to a new place.
Is my bit of gold more about finally understanding that every life phase is filled with unexpected events? About finding resiliency, not of moving to the perfect place where all will be wonderful. Months of time ticking by as I find my way over speed bumps with walks into nature, with meditation, with watercolor beginnings, and with new writing friends.
Writing is about finding connections in the pieces of life. Discovering yourself. Seeing stories. The golden glimmer on the window sill reminds me to continue. Holding on to a bit of gold is my reminder to breathe, to be in the moment, to write.
